Dear Future Me: a letter to myself

Well smack my ass and call me Sally. I’ve just gone and surprised myself.

 

This was not the post I was planning on sharing today, but then I got to procrastinating and was going through my own Facebook posts from way back when (yeah I know, it’s kinda sad stalking yourself but someone’s gotta do it) when I came across something I wrote to myself seven years ago. Ancient history for sure but this stuff resonated with me like whoah.

 

So at the time there was this meme going around which encouraged people to write a letter to their Future Self. Basically it was a meant as a huge pep talk to be read when shit gets real, but mostly it was meant remind our future selves that things will get better. Because you know, you made it this far.

 

Tear-jerker – I has it. Get ready for some serious life stuff.

 

 

Dear Future Me

 

I know today you feel like life is heavy and unbearable, but I want you to remember it isn’t always like that, and I want you to remember things that really matter.

 

Don’t become bitter of things you have no control over, of things that have already happened or things you cannot achieve. Bitterness is like a heavy load, it will blind you to the beautiful things in life and it will slowly eat you up inside. Nothing that anyone does to you is worth of you carrying it with you for the rest of your life. Don’t waste time in hating. It doesn’t make you stronger; in fact, it makes you weaker. Hating might be easier and the safer option, but ultimately it drains you and makes you weak.

 

Remember that where you came from or who you were will never dictate who you are or who you can become. Remember that past trespasses will not define you. Don’t be afraid to make mistakes, and to sometimes fail. Remember that it is only a chance to do it again and to succeed, or to find another way. Remember that you are not a sum of your failures, but of also of your victories.

 

Don’t be afraid you will never become who you wanted to become. You have already become you, a unique character with unique experiences, one of a kind, never to be again. Don’t be afraid no one will remember you once you are gone. You will forever live in the hearts of those who love you, and if those who don’t won’t remember you, it isn’t much of a loss.

 

Rejoice in the small achievements as much as the big ones. Getting up in the morning or making that perfect cup of coffee is as much of an achievement as is getting a promotion or the grade you wanted. Don’t set yourself limits to what is acceptable to rejoice about. Life has so much unhappiness that finding a seed of joy in even the smallest things can brighten up even your darkest hour.  Remember that no darkness, no matter how deep, is forever. Even after the longest night comes dawn.

 

Don’t be afraid to give up, or to pick your battles Every war is not worth fighting and sometimes it’s better to spare your strength to the ones that actually matter.

 

Don’t be afraid to admit you hurt, you failed or you haven’t gone as far as you wanted to go. Don’t be ashamed to not have what others have. It doesn’t make you weaker or make you look stupid. It can only open options to make things better, be it friendly advice or the hug you really needed all along.

 

Don’t build up defences trying to protect yourself from getting hurt, it doesn’t work and it only isolates you from people who love you and can carry you when you can’t carry yourself.

 

Don’t be afraid to love, and if you must, also lose the ones you love. Don’t forget love never disappears, even though the object of it might change. Don’t think you love less because something doesn’t meet the standards you set them; they aren’t meant to. Love freely, without asking for anything in return, without any bounds. Love is never wasted, even when not returned.

 

Don’t judge people based on their mistakes and their misfortunes. Rejoice in their achievements. Remember that even when they achieve something you cannot grasp, it takes nothing away from you. Don’t envy people for what they have, but be thankful for what you do have.

 

Don’t count every penny; some experiences cannot be valued in money. If you need money, lend it, but always pay back your debts. Remember that money is designed to move. Don’t waste your nights awake worrying about money, whether you have it or not will not change overnight, and worrying is so much more productive after a good night’s sleep.

 

Don’t be afraid to make a fool of yourself. We are all fools of our own life.

 

Don’t apologise for who you were in the past. It only led you to who you are today. Accept that you were not complete then, and you are not complete now. Accept you will never be complete. Remember your life is a journey and not a race, an adventure and not a path of mourning. Accept that next year you won’t be the same as you are today. Don’t be afraid to change, because it is inevitable and will happen whether you want it to or not.

 

Accept that you have limits. You can’t do everything, nor were you meant to. Remember you have your strengths, and others have theirs. Be happy that you can be different to everyone else. Allow others difference to enrich your life, not to burden it.

 

Don’t worry what people think about you. You can waste an entire lifetime trying to please everyone, when the only person you need to please is you; no-one else has to live with you for the rest of your days. Try to think good of people, even when they don’t deserve it, but if you must think ill of them, do so briefly and to yourself. Don’t lower yourself to inane gossip and malicious badmouthing.

 

Don’t lie to people. Respect others enough to tell them the truth, or to gracefully fall silent if you have nothing else to say.

 

Remember that you are invaluable, irreplaceable and unique just as you are. Accept you are just you, exactly as you are, cannot be anything else and shouldn’t be anything else. Don’t compare yourself to others, because they are not who you are and can never compare to you.

 

Remember to live every day with the best intentions to live it like it’s your last (even if you can’t), to live fearlessly (as much as you can) and most importantly to live today. Tomorrow will come in its own pace whether you worry about it or not. There is a saying: yesterday is history, tomorrow is a mystery, but today is a gift. That is why it is called the “present.”

 

With so much love,

Your Past Self

 

I don’t know about you, but I feel like I needed to hear that again today.

Did you take part in this meme? Let me know in the comments!

  • Perla

    To my future self I’ll tell the time of just thinking is one of the most precious time I could possible spend on this earth. And that there are not good or bad days, just life as it comes.

  • Anela Hrnic

    I love this post! I only saw “letters to my younger self” so far but this one is actually better as you can look back on your thoughts 🙂

  • Great text and for sure a reminder for all of us, just to make our life better xo

    http://www.theninebyivana.blogspot.com

  • Phaytea’s Pulse

    This is so nicely written….Reminders in there that we need to hear/read daily…Thank you for sharing this

  • This brought a tear to my eye.
    Really beautiful writing.
    Book marking this xx

  • Jasmin N

    Even that’s a letter for future you, I saw there some points I needed in my life at this very moment, thank you.

  • Karoliina Kazi

    What a beautiful letter and definitely a tear-jerker. I see myself in there… these are such great reminders of what’s truly important and how things usually work out, even if at the time it feels overwhelming. xx

  • Well, if this isn’t the greatest pep talk to self than I don’t know what is! Loved reading it and
    P.S. I also stalk myself *shamelessly*

  • Lara Oliveira

    I know the feeling! Whenever I come across things I wrote 7, 10 or 20 years ago, they always still have an eery relevance to my life today. Great message, reminders, and post! 😉 XO Miss Portmanteau
    http://www.missportmanteau.com

  • This is a spectacular post – so well written and filled with so much truth! Thank you for sharing it here.

  • I couldn’t resist commenting. Exceptionally well written! http://bing.org

  • It’s such a great read, for anyone. Just motivational. This is a great idea..but I must admit as a parent I have written similar to my children in the future.

  • I never took part in the challenge myself but I feel I should of, it’s such a nice way of reflecting on your past in a positive way. It was a lovely post/letter to read 🙂

  • Lovely post, I find myself in this xo

    http://www.theninebyivana.blogspot.com

  • I shall do this myself too 🙂 Great idea!

  • Such a great read!! Few great thoughts and messages inside it!! 🙂 Thanks for sharing!! 🙂

  • That is a nice read! You made me miss writing on a diary 🙂

    The Budget Fashion Seeker

  • I love this idea so much!! great post!

  • Love this letter!